LIFE
SKILLS AND ADVICE
#1
On
Stupidity
Description
Stupidity
(or idiocy, dumbassery, etc.) is described as either a disease or a syndrome
that cause impairment of mental process.
It affects
all sentient beings at some point during their existence and is believed to be
the cause of almost all armed conflict on planet Earth. Stupidity is known to
lower both IG and its social equivalent (social IQ). The affliction comes in
many forms. The illness is capable of reaching advanced stages comparable to
that of HIV and AIDS. The illness is incapable of being treated once it has
reached such stages. Currently debates are being held within international
organizations concerning the disease- several nations proposing victims of the
advanced stage of the disease be quarantined or culled.
Stupidity
is not to be confused with learning disorders, psychological disorders and
neurological illnesses. Stupidity is responsible for nearly all of the world's
problems such increased death rates worldwide and widespread armed conflict.
Types
Stupidity
comes in many forms, some of which are still being discovered by scientists.
Common types present in society are:
•
unjustified
emotional sickness of the 'heart' (love sick)
•
'self'-
induced stupidity
•
'other'-
induced stupidity
•
Natural
stupidity
•
Temporary
stupidity (also known as adolescence)
Causes
Stupidity
has been documented to have many causes that initiate the illness, in most
cases this is solely the fault of the individual- see the related article 'On
Self- Induced Stupidity'
•
Love
•
Hate
•
Religion
(in extreme cases)
•
Laziness
•
Stereotyping
•
Race
•
Viewing
and Listening to Stupid Media (such as reading an article that describe Stupidity in detail)
•
Nature
Symptoms
This
details the symptoms of the illness in humans, though is widely believed to
apply to all sentient beings. The
disease is known for it easily identifiable symptoms.
•
Causes
harm to self and others for no logical reason and reasons unknown, inexplicable
or stupid reasons
•
Naivety
•
Poor
motor control and loss of cognitive functions
•
Unjustified
lust
•
Dismissive
of the intelligent
•
Being
an idiot
•
Being
the 'raw' type of a race
Advanced Stupidity and its symptoms
Advanced
Stupidity is a loose term referring to the limit or height of Stupidity. If
stupidity continues without treatment, it may reach its advanced stages. The
patient is considered 'beyond help' when such a situation occurs. No examples
are ever used in media to show advance stupidity due to the social implications
and of the disease. This clearly shows that one is completely and utterly
hopeless once they have been diagnosed with 'Advanced Stupidity'
Symptoms
of 'Advanced Stupidity' include and are not limited to:
•
incapability
to learn not caused by learning disorders, psychological disorders and
neurological disorders
•
incapability
to understand fundamental unwritten laws of society
•
sudden
urge to 'spit out' irrelevant (and often wrong) facts, figures, statistics and
information
•
deep
knowledge and understanding of statistics
•
unnatural,
constant cross-eyed expression on patients face
•
incapability
to sxphell
•
constant
droning and use of “DUH” and “UH” in speech
•
blonde
hair
•
extremely
good or bad sense of fashion not present in functioning members of society
•
incapability
to diagnose stupidity
•
designing
and creating robots with the potential to become evil overlords
•
'playing'
with Science (specifically Nuclear energy)
Diagnosis
Stupidity
is an easily diagnosable by most functioning members of society and is the most
identifiable illness in the known universe.
 |
| The saddest moment in a doctor's life. |
Common
methods of diagnosing stupidity:
•
just
looking at the person
•
comparing
patient to a victim of stupidity
•
use
of 'cause of effect' theory – this is used to invoke a stupid reaction from the
patient
•
most
of the time you can just tell
if someone is stupid, diagnosis is almost always made redundant by this
fact
Treatment
Only
one known cure has been found for stupidity- education. One stupidity has
reached its advanced stages, it cannot be cured. Stupidity is only curable if
and only if symptoms of its advanced stages are not present. The World Health
Organization (WHO????) has raised awareness of stupidity due to the seriousness
of the rather minor affliction. Despite this and the efforts of the
intelligent, stupidity still remains as a common illness that is more present
in the 21st Century than prehistoric ages (the 20th
Century)
 |
| Propaganda...with MS Paint. |
Treatment
for Stupidity:
•
Education
Prevention
Stupidity
is best avoided and prevented rather than cured. If cured- a normal human will
experience immense regret from his previous life as a victim of stupidity and
may suffer from depression. Cured patients have been reported to commit
suicide.
 |
| Even more propaganda....god bless whomever created MS Paint. |
Common Prevention
Methods:
•
Ignoring
stupid media
•
Applying
oneself concerning education
•
Listening
to the intelligent
•
Reporting
the stupid
On
Reporting the Stupid
Report all
stupid people to your local school- Remember by doing so you are not just doing
yourself a favor, but are doing society a favor. Stupid persons are easily
identifiable: See 'Symptoms.'
ConclusionStupidity has killed many and will continue to do so, awareness must be made to prevent the illness spreading and killing us all. Stupidity is more present that it should be- I beg of humanity to fix this before WWW III (Wet Wipin' [the] World [again]/ World War III)
Note to
Readers: This article was written at a time when World War III was not
happening and when Robot insurgency was mere fiction. It may not still reflect
the author's feeling and thoughts now that he is serving under his evil robot
overlord- 'T-1000.'
 |
| Get me an Oil change, these flames don't fire up themselves! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED. |
